Sam tried to fuck me in the middle of the night.

So there I was lying in bed and all sudden I feel hands on me.  Sam’s hand had been lying on my stomach, its usual spot while we sleep.  But suddenly I was very conscious of it rising up my chest.  The ascent was slow and smooth.  His half awake body was trying to molest me without waking me.  His hands reached my breasts and started to squeeze and caress them.  I desperately wanted to be asleep so I continued to ignore his advances.  His hands slowly eased my shirt up until my boobs were exposed and his mouth was on them.  He kissed my tits, licked them, and rested his head on my bare chest.  I’m fairly certain he actually fell back asleep at this point.  But suddenly he was awake again and somehow my hand was now on his dick.  Yea, I think in my sleep my hand walked itself over there because I have no memory of taking such action.  So since my hand was there I thought I might as well make him feel good.  I stroked his cock, ran my hands up and down it gently.  But his dick was thinking the same thing as me, “I’d rather be sleeping!”  Since it was still trying to enjoy REM it never got hard, which was actually a good thing.  We slowly drifted back to dream land. 

What’s funny about this experience was that today Sam actually admitted to the incident.  He said to me, “I tried to rape you in your sleep last night, so we better have sex tonight!”  So in an effort to preserve our precious sleeping hours, we’re definitely getting it on before bed tonight! 

Sam, if you’re reading this, you’d better get ready!

Vibrator Interview- Camilla Post

Hi, I’m Camilla, Sam’s partner in writing and in the bedroom.  The following is an interview Sam did with me about my vibrator use.  We’d love to hear back from our readers about your use of vibrators!  We’d love funny stories, first time user stories, and stories from those who absolutely hate the tool!  Enjoy!

What type of vibrator do you use?

My favorite vibrator, the one that’s on standby under my bed, is the Hitachi Magic Wand.  I think it was even in Sex in the City.  I believe it’s billed as a massager, but a lot of women use it as a vibrator.  It is unbelievably powerful and works every time.  It has two speeds- the normal speed and the one that will rub your clit raw!  I highly highly highly recommend this product!  Ladies out there, if you have this model- let us know what you think!

What’s your history with vibrators?

I bought my first vibrator in college when I was having trouble reaching a climax.  I bought a very small bullet type vibrator.  It was pink, plastic and very weak on the vibration scale.  I was nervous and excited to try it out, but my partner at the time was not.  There’s nothing like an uptight asshole to ruin a vibrator experience!  As time went on and boyfriends changed I purchased a bunny rabbit style vibe, with the clitoral and internal stimulation.  Although I liked the feeling of being filled up, the clit is where I really find my pleasure.  As I discovered this, I found a strong external vibrator is all I really need.  With Sam I’ve found the Magic Wand works wonders.  We recently bought a small Doc Johnson vibrator to use while traveling.  We haven’t used it much yet- but I’ll let you know what I think of it after a few tries.

When is your favorite time to vibrate?

My favorite time to vibe is whenever I get the time!  But during sex I normally vibe at the end.  Since the vibrator I use is so large it doesn’t lend itself to being used during penetration. Sam and I tried some smaller vibes during sex.  We’ve tried the kind that go around his wing wang and have a tiny bullet to rub my clit.  They just never seemed to work that well and the tight ring around his shlong made me feel bad for him.

What do you think about while you do it?

I think about whatever seems sexy at the time.  When Sam is there to help I like him to tell me about what we just did, what he’d like to do to me or how sexy he thinks I am.  When he’s not there to help me out, I just imagine what I’d like to be doing with him or some super hot sex we’ve had in the past.  That’s one good thing about women’s memories; men always seem to complain that we remember everything.  Well, sometimes that memory comes in very handy!

What’s your favorite place to touch with the vibrator?

I’m 100% sure that my favorite place is the clit.  Sure, I’ll move the vibrator around a bit, but I’ll always end up back at the clit.  There’s just nothing like it.  Feeling that sensation sends a surge of energy and excitement through my body that can’t be beat!

What would you say to someone who thinks vibing is gross?

I’d probably say, that’s their loss.  I’d also say, loosen up and get over yourself!  Sex isn’t supposed to be serious, it’s supposed to be fun.  So have a little fun, relax and it will be much more enjoyable.  Hell, sex isn’t like doing your taxes, you’re supposed to smile and feel good while doing it!

Is vibing better than sex?

No, absolutely not.  I like to think of a vibe like a little hot fudge on some ice cream.  Yes, ice cream is delicious, refreshing and just want you wanted.  But you know what would be even better?  Some ice cream with a little hot fudge drizzled on top.  Using a vibe is not a substitute for sex, unless you’re partner is traveling or doesn’t exist.  But I’d almost always chose sex over just a vibe.

Now I have to admit there are times when you’re just horny and you may not want to do the whole sex thing and that’s when a vibe is great.  It’s quick, it’s simple and it gets the job done.

Do you have any special tips for other women who like to vibe?

Experiment with different styles, shapes, textures, etc.  Keep trying until you find the vibrator that works best for you.  Another thing I’ve learned about using a vibe is that sometimes you can’t do it naked.  I know that sounds odd so let me explain… the vibe I have now is so powerful I cannot use it without some type of protection on my skin.  I typically put my underwear back on so there’s a barrier between me and the device that could literally sandblast my clit. Ladies (or men), incorporate your man into the process!  There’s no reason to vibe secretly!  If your partner is worth his salt they should be excited and very willing to partake in your masturbation.

Alright you horny readers out there do you have any questions?  If so, put down your vibe and leave us a comment.  Sam and I will do our best to answer!

Also for those who are interested in obtaining their own toys, here are two of our favorite stores:

www.babeland.com

www.adamevetoys.com